Snow Day

Epic

This morning we were at the pediatrician for almost two hours. It was the whole "called back right away but then left to moulder in an exam room alone for 40 minutes trick". Except we were not alone. The whole family was together! Miss Bee enjoyed the contents of my purse. J and I were busy keeping Baby N warm as we had had to undress her to be weighed. She was just about asleep when the doctor finally came in for N's examination. She was pronounced to be in good health and ready for vaccinations.

I am pro vaccine. I believe it is the duty of every parent to have their child vaccinated for their own health and for the public at large. However I do not like watching my baby get her shots. My guess is that no mother does. And today, the beastly nurse--don't know where she came from because they are mostly so nice--jabbed my darling baby bird as if she was sewing up a Thanksgiving turkey. Not once but three times. Baby N bled a surprising amount and cried herself to sleep in indignation.

At home, N spent the next couple hours sleeping and whimpering. By mid afternoon she was really hurting and switched to full on screaming. I don't know how some poor parents survive colic. Here I was, feeling pretty competent as a mom of two, with my nerves completely frayed after about 30 minutes of crying. J and I took turns holding our little tea kettle, who eventually wore herself out and subsided into snuffling.

For the rest of the day N slept and ate and cried. My mom came over and played with Bee. We ordered pizza.

Around 8:00 pm, N woke up feeling a lot better. She feasted. And then feasted some more. She was bright eyed and wiggling and seemed to be her old self. I was feeling relaxed for the first time all day. Then she barfed all over me and my bed. It was like a tidal wave of regurgitated milk. Amazing in its quantity and consistency. Lots of things are in the laundry and the moment. Hungry after her mighty effort, she nursed again and is sleeping peacefully now.

I am hopelessly in love with this baby, but I am looking forward to a hopefully more normal day tomorrow.

Two weeks

In just two weeks we are headed back to Romania. I am in denial. I wish I could keep my husband home with me forever, snug in our new house, grown fat with daily trips to Starbucks.

America is easy. Everything you could possibly need is available, prepackaged, and clean. Multiple sizes and colors. The largeness of Target. The ridiculous selection of foodstuffs at the grocery store. Tempting fast food on nearly every street corner. Instead of zipping to Safeway and strolling the mall, we will be shopping at the market and walking in the park.

In Romania, I will get to stay home with my girls for the next several months. A luxury indeed. Slightly terrifying as well. How will we structure our day? How to keep Bee occupied when I am feeding and caring for Baby N? Will I go stir crazy? Or worse, will going back to work in June completely break my heart?

Two books

"Sacred Hearts" by Sarah Dunant: It's fantastic! Five stars! A must read! Please excuse my gratuitous usage of exclamation points but I really really enjoyed this book. The author locks you inside a Italian convent from the 1600s and won't let you out until you read every last page. The story is extremely absorbing, and you're rewarded with a really well crafted ending.

"Every Secret Thing" by Ann Tatlock: I thought this would be interesting because it was about a boarding school, but really, it managed to throw a wrench in my newly renewed enthusiasm for reading novels. The characters were not particularly likable. The story was rather predictable. All in all, I would say this book is one to pass over.

Have Mercy

I am having quite a laugh listening to my husband and daughter play in the other room. Bee is pretending to be some sort of twisted doctor/ beautician and is torturing my husband with her (play) Disney princess hair dryer.

"Have mercy!" he cries.

"I'm not Mercy!" she responds.

"No! Ouch! No! Mercy is a concept, not a person. . ." my husband attempts to explain, as he fights off the hair dryer.

"A person!" Bee squeals in response.

I fear that the distinction is lost on her.

Merging

I anguished a lot these past couple of weeks about how I am going to manage to be a good parent to two little girls. What to do when Baby N is crying because she wants to nurse and Miss Bee is crying because she wants Mommy to put her to bed and I am almost crying because it's really loud and I'm just tired.

But there are good things too--today Bee and I went to the library, just the two of us. We did puzzles and checked out a whole stack of books. Afterward, I called home and was informed that Baby N was fast asleep, so Bee and I went to Starbucks, ordered the usual (milk for her and a chai latte for me) and read her storybooks. We were both happy and relaxed afterward, and it made for a good afternoon at home.

I am starting to figure out balancing the both of them--an arsenal of games that I can play with Bee while I am feeding the baby, and encouraging Bee to accept doing more things with my husband. And I am learning that I can't rein in my three year old too tightly--as she is wont to stomp and sing exuberantly and squeeze the baby a little tighter than I would like. She is just being a three year old, and I have to set boundaries without crushing her tender feelings. I want Bee to be her vibrant self, love her Mama and her still love her sister.

Little things

Only a few random thoughts tonight--I really should be going to bed because both my girls have gone to sleep and the littlest one will certainly be awake three hours from now. . .

Miss Bee was very patient with her tired parents this morning. She woke up around 7. I had been awake from 3-6 am and was consequently hoping for a little more sleep. I managed to make sure she went potty and wasn't attempting to play with any sharp objects before passing out in my bed again. I think she read some books to herself for a while, but then very sweetly, yet insistently, crawled into her bed to wake up her mommy and daddy. The poor child wanted some breakfast.

Baby N had a bath today and I can't decide whether her freshly washed hair looks more like a dandelion puff or baby crow feathers. The latter I think. Her hair is a deep dark brown like my husband's. Little babies are positively bewitching.

My husband's love for me manifested itself in a new vacuum today. I have been longing for one that works properly and not only does it work, it is a gorgeous little Dyson canister vacuum. I am too spoiled. Tomorrow I will vacuum the entire house and sigh happily the entire time.

Another month here before we trek back to Romania. There is still so much I want to soak up here in the US. I am glad that we'll be back in the summer. This is home.